I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Randomize
