so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
