k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Randomize
