There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
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