I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Randomize
