He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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