Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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