I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
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