Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
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