His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
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