did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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