But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
