My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Randomize