In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
