he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
only you would photoshop your dick
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
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