I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
now i know why i became what i already was.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize
