just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Randomize
