I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
