it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
my shit smells like andre
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
