I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Randomize
