plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
and you said cock pushups were impossible
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize