I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
