I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
