I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Randomize
