Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
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