gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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