I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Randomize
