I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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