5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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