hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
