Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
