But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Randomize
