So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
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