My hand turned me down
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
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