Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Randomize
