Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize