my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
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