apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
my poor anus
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
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