I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
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