: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Randomize
