oh god the rape fog is back!
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
