i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
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