R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
