we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
