I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Randomize
