U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
