The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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