wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Randomize
