Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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