I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Randomize
