Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Randomize
