So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
