I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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